butterflydreaming | Thinkie Bits

It started with an article flashing by on the MSN homepage, containing this jaw drop inducing bit:

5. There’s such a thing as “Pill goggles.” Consider these the first cousin to beer goggles—if you’re taking the birth-control pill, ladies, your taste in men may take a turn. That’s because birth control pills affect women’s hormone levels and to whom they are attracted. In one study, researcher Tony Little showed women different images of men and asked them to make their picks. Results show that women on birth control pills tended to choose men with more pronounced masculine features than those who weren’t on the Pill. The downside here? These manly traits are linked to high testosterone levels, aggressive behavior, and even higher divorce rates. So if you’re on the Pill, don’t turn a blind eye to those red flags… your contraception could cloud your judgment and lead you to fall for a less-than-wonderful guy. "7 quirky facts about chemistry",the rest of it is here

Following the link to the origin of the article led me to Happen Magazine, part of Match.com. I was looking through the archives to see if I could find the 7 quirky facts article, and came across this one, about dating someone with a tell-all blog, and this one, which I read as an example of the difference between dating around and polyamory.

As enlightening as opinion collecting is, it hurts my brain to try to come to any conclusions or to bring it together in a coherent whole. I'm quite certain that I think too much. I want to understand things that defy understanding. Love/sex relationships include too many variables. Once again I wonder, why do I care? And, what do I want?

Questions eternal. I'm so scared of my Whim that being "easy" is work. Now I feel like I need to explain both Whim and easy. How about short versions?

My Whim is stronger than my Will. I've said this before, most of you already know. When I get a spontaneous thought in my head, there is a strong push of desire behind it, even when I know it would be a bad thing to do. Classic example: putting my hand on the hot burner on the stove. It's not my will that keeps me from stepping out into traffic, it's my practiced ability to talk myself down.

I'm a noodle often enough to know that my Will is nowhere near as strong. I make decisions, and they are hard to stick to. I think that some of the difference might be because Whim is a short burst, while Will is long-term. The power behind Will is thinned out.

I've been happy to own "slut", but it wasn't until MWE brought up the idea of being easy that I thought about the greater philosophy that can go with the concept. It's not about sex specifically; it is about sex inclusively. It's a headspace that carries over to everything. Being easy is pretty much what I want to be. It means not borrowing trouble; it means being accepting of possibilities, without hindering expectations. It means that the past is past, and the future is whatever it will be. To me, it's another way of saying that the bitter is sweet, when you understand the flavor.