Yue, Cardcaptor Sakura fanfic
Sep. 30th, 2010 09:01 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
butterflydreamingOff of Prompt 263 at ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
daily_prompt:You see I'm falling in the vast abyss
Clouded by memories of the past
If it's too similar to his musings in the earlier part of the fanfic, I'll probably cut it, even though I like the reference to Tinkerbell. Ideally, since I'm heading to the end, it will balance/tie-in to that earlier section.
***
In the continuing days, Yue existed in a cloud. He couldn’t disconnect enough from Yukito when his other self was awake and active. At night, he rarely did anything more than sit in the dark downstairs great room staring into darkness. His memories had finally settled. That had also happened with the internal restructuring that had allowed Yukito more control. Yue’s memories of the past were as hazy as old photographs without being distant.
He felt betrayed: by Clow for the sealing of his memory, by Keroberos, because the Sun Guardian did not grieve as Yue did, and even by Yukito, who had lived the life of a high school boy in carefree ignorance. There but for the whim of Clow go I. Since Yukito was Yue’s own doing -- as he had been and as he was now -- Yue knew that he had betrayed himself.
He remembered some things with bitter clarity, such as how on the night that his master and father announced his intention to die, Clow had bad Yue to live. Insensitive as always, the sorcerer, focus of Yue’s first and all-consuming love, had left him without guidance on how to fulfill that last command. The new master was a child; Sakura had barely experienced life herself. She had lost her mother too young to understand his current burden.
Touya understands. The thought slipped its way out of the fog. Yue pushed it away.
Yue had never before been alone. Bereft. His life had been with Clow and Keroberos, always. He had not had to question his place. He knew, without needing to ask, who he was. Without Clow, he was nothing. No one needed him. He had gone for years unmissed… .
More lies, he heard the voice whisper. Mirror and Windy and the others, the spirits of the Clow Cards, were pleased at your return.
They were all Sakura Cards now. They had had to change to live. Many of the Card spirits were only sprites, who like John Barrie’s little fairy were such small creatures that they could only contain one emotion at a time. They had no capacity to remember or mourn. Yue could not fault them for it. He envied their simplicity.
daily_prompt:You see I'm falling in the vast abyssClouded by memories of the past
If it's too similar to his musings in the earlier part of the fanfic, I'll probably cut it, even though I like the reference to Tinkerbell. Ideally, since I'm heading to the end, it will balance/tie-in to that earlier section.
***
In the continuing days, Yue existed in a cloud. He couldn’t disconnect enough from Yukito when his other self was awake and active. At night, he rarely did anything more than sit in the dark downstairs great room staring into darkness. His memories had finally settled. That had also happened with the internal restructuring that had allowed Yukito more control. Yue’s memories of the past were as hazy as old photographs without being distant.
He felt betrayed: by Clow for the sealing of his memory, by Keroberos, because the Sun Guardian did not grieve as Yue did, and even by Yukito, who had lived the life of a high school boy in carefree ignorance. There but for the whim of Clow go I. Since Yukito was Yue’s own doing -- as he had been and as he was now -- Yue knew that he had betrayed himself.
He remembered some things with bitter clarity, such as how on the night that his master and father announced his intention to die, Clow had bad Yue to live. Insensitive as always, the sorcerer, focus of Yue’s first and all-consuming love, had left him without guidance on how to fulfill that last command. The new master was a child; Sakura had barely experienced life herself. She had lost her mother too young to understand his current burden.
Touya understands. The thought slipped its way out of the fog. Yue pushed it away.
Yue had never before been alone. Bereft. His life had been with Clow and Keroberos, always. He had not had to question his place. He knew, without needing to ask, who he was. Without Clow, he was nothing. No one needed him. He had gone for years unmissed… .
More lies, he heard the voice whisper. Mirror and Windy and the others, the spirits of the Clow Cards, were pleased at your return.
They were all Sakura Cards now. They had had to change to live. Many of the Card spirits were only sprites, who like John Barrie’s little fairy were such small creatures that they could only contain one emotion at a time. They had no capacity to remember or mourn. Yue could not fault them for it. He envied their simplicity.