Life sort of update

[butterflydreaming]

My desk is crowded, so I end up working at the dining table.

I go through cycles of cleaning up my desk. It's currently on a messy cycle. But regardless, I rarely sit at it for any kind of crafting, because I sit at it enough for writing and such. It's a little low to stand at. The dining table lets me have more space and sunlight, and to get out of the corner.

I need to clean my desk.

This is what I'm making out of those flowers:

A hair barrette made out of soda pop tabs.

The materials, except for the barrette hardware, come from scrap sources: pop tabs, handed down wool-blend yarn, wire from printer cartridge resources, plastic beads from someone's destash, clear plastic food containers. Oh, and I had the barrettes already. I think my sister G might have sent them to me; she sometimes sends random crafting stuff.

These are the hair clips that will be for sale (consignment) at ReTreasure. I think they are pretty cute. I'd buy one for $8. I'd buy one for as much as $15, but that felt high for the venue. Besides, no one has any money these days. I tried to pick a price point that would inspire the truly crafty to opt for studio time and supplies but be inviting enough for the not-so-crafty to prefer to buy.

I haven't sold on consignment since The Crazy Daisy (art collective). I did enjoy that, having my beadwork alongside Tracy Katchik-Anders paintings, as well as the work of other fine artist and artisans. (Her art isn't up anywhere anymore, unless it's just that her site isn't loading for me.) If I have a regret, it's that I've dragged my feet for ages about selling anywhere.

That's been a big part of my focus for the last couple of weeks. I had a small meltdown on Wednesday because I am slow about everything I care about, not that my long emo post about that exists anymore. I'm not all together better, but it is what it is. My take away is a lesson that took me too long: stop underestimating how much time I need for anything. (And I mean, too long. In 1989 I sat down to type up a long co-written, handwritten fanfic, thinking it might take as much as 3 hours. Try, >3 months of typing sessions at my coauthor's dad's computer.)

My dad is in town. He arrived without forewarning on Wednesday, right about the time I was emoting. The good news is that I put myself together enough to do a birthday dinner for my niece (now 13) that night, on her actual birthday, and the continuing upside of seeing my sister, my other local niece, and my BIL at the same time. There was ice cream cake. I got to give presents to my sister (belated/just because) and to the birthday girl (purple stuff!) that I actually had ready and even wrapped.

My dad is 79, and my mom died in 2008. Mother's Day is kind of a suck holiday for me, and my dad is often difficult to be around when he rants (his anti-marijuana rant should have been funny, not sad-making tho'), and he loses the thread of thoughts more these days. But since we don't have mom anymore, it has made us more aware of still having dad. Basically, we eat at restaurants a lot, and I try to keep the conversation on pleasant topics. I'm pretty good at steering it away from the rants before they get traction.

I'm going to go read my Marco Polo book now, because I haven't had any reading time in forever. I take a different bus in the morning, the 512, it's a 5 minute ride to my stop and if I don't pay attention I'll end up in Everett. I don't know why I can't seem to remember to bring my book for the bus home. Probably because I suck, kind of like a lot of stuff in my life generally does.

Comments

[goodmode]

those barrettes look so cute! i really dig it when stuff gets upcycled creatively and these are so lovely. my compliments :^)

i'm sorry that things are difficult for you atm and i hope things look up. i also hope you enjoy your book! i got a few really nice-looking books as gifts this year and just haven't found any time to read them :^( ADULT LIFE IS SO BUSY. all the best of luck handling yours :')

[butterflydreaming]

Thank you! I really appreciate the encouragement.

[t_hale_capital]

Those barrettes are pretty! And how cool that all the materials are recycled or repurposed.

****hugs****

[butterflydreaming]

Hugs! Thank you for hugs.

[adventurat]

Pretty barrette! Good luck with the sales. Is the butterfly-shaped plastic backing part of the barrette, or a photographic coincidence?

I'm glad you enjoyed your unexpected family time. Parents at or near 80 are to be treasured, I've decided. Mine are that age, too, and I try not to take their being there for granted.

YOU do not suck, my friend. Knock that kind of self-talk off, if you would, please. You may struggle, you may have too much to do to be able to do it all justice, but you do NOT suck. Adult life involves a lot. There's never enough time for everything. It doesn't mean you suck. Because, clearly, YOU DON'T.

[butterflydreaming]

The plastic backing is intentional. :) Instead of a paperboard backing, I cut some out of clear plastic containers. I think it gives it a more finished look to be clipped on a backing, since that is how commercial hair gizzies are sold. I'm continuing the butterfly theme of all artistic endeavors.

I seem to operate on the beliefs that I suck as well as that I am awesome, at the same time. I can tell myself "stop being crap," and it's kind of inspiring. I dislike that friends see me doing that, but if I don't say or write it, I only think it. At some point on this journey, maybe I will stop seeing it as suckage and quit the pattern of negative self-assessment.

Regardless, thank you for the discouragement from negative self-talk. ^_^

[adventurat]

Ah, I wasn't sure if it were intended to be part of the barrette (though I didn't think so). That makes much more sense!

I like this take on our tendency towards negative self talk:
The world will like up ten deep to tell you you suck (at writing, at creating, at everything). Don't do their work for them.