Date: 2012-08-11 10:44 pm (UTC)
butterflydreaming: The steps of the Sizzle dance (Sizzle)
Thank you immensely! That is very useful feedback. The eBay teapot is problematic; I might be able to strengthen that bit so that it is more obviously a red herring. I was considering cutting it, but it is the opportunity to introduce Marin's smart phone. I think I can fit some dialog where Nathan explains what he did with the stolen teapots. Here is one of the places where I could do so much without the shortness constraint.

I also see the weakness of the easily solved mystery. I focused on the relationships, but I think I need to put more into the mystery to really make this fit the genre.

I'm glad you did enjoy it. Thank you again for reading! I'll make good use of your feedback.
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