Conversation with Myself

[butterflydreaming]

secretagentlost told me about a way to journal that can be revealing. I'm giving it a try.

I thought you were going to use rich text so readers could tell which side is talking?

It'll have to be spacing breaks. Anyway, it's me either way, ne? It's easier to just do the link and cut myself. I don't trust the rich text mode, and once you start it's frustrating to fix. I spent too much time today fixing a small mistake (not mine). What a hassle. And I'm going to have to do more work later because of that same mistake.

Why are you still at work?!?

If I go home, I'm not turning on the computer. {raspberry} Oh! You already know, but I finally have a flat screen monitor again. If I wasn't so happy about it, I would be really annoyed that THREE of the L.O.s (none of whom have been producing business) have had a better computer and screen than mine since I started. But I'm really happy about it. No one else admitted to being able to see the way the old monitor pulsated. What's with that? L said people's brains edit, and mine edits less. I may as well stay here at the office and read LJ. And update.

Which you haven't been doing much of...

Yeah, but like an overly dutiful person I read my f'list, even if it takes hours to catch up. Usually I read it in short bursts during breaks, then a bit at the end of the day. Most of the time I don't get away from my desk for lunch.

I've been meaning to ask you -- what do you think of the job, now that you've been doing it for over a year? Still miss coffee? Looking for anything else?

The job... pays for things. It's okay. Work. I do miss being a barista, but I don't miss idiot customers. You can't have it all, can you? I miss it enough that if I could, I'd go back to it a few hours a week. Roland was looking for a barista, before. But then, I wouldn't want to spoil a place I love by making it a place of work. As far as looking for something else... well, I don't know what I'd do. My boss now is easy-going, and they appreciate me here. I have benes, paid vacation & holidays, and flexibility in my hours. Bonus, too. Sometimes it sucks, but what job doesn't? In happy-la-la make-believe, I guess I would enjoy doing costume design. Or maybe I could have a patron and write. Occasionally L and I talk about how we could start a porn company; we would have the best porn! Not as actors!!! As owners of the company, directors of film and merchandise... yeah.

Speaking of sex --

No.

Okay, well, then. So, today you're handing over the keys to the apartment, and you finally went down to the park to take pictures of the stacked rocks. Are you happy?

I'm not unhappy. I'm okay. Okay should be plenty. I'll probably do something fun on Saturday, like go out to Snoqualmie Falls. I have chocolate pudding in my refrigerator. I have fic to finish for tsukimineshrine before I miss *another* challenge expiration. I guess that means I'm turning the computer on when I get home, after all.

You should get going. Hey, now you don't have to pay for peak! That's two bits for you. By the way, don't forget to buy your August bus pass.

I miss abebes_heir. I know it's stupid, but I do. Everything still reminds me that he's not coming here, and if I see him again it won't be for a very long time, and-and-and. That's not as non-sequiter as it might seem... those thoughts are on connected cars in this thought train.

Is anyone reading this? Somebody probably is. Oops, I'm not talking to myself anymore.

Then finish typing. Don't post this!

It's lj-cut. How about locked?

No, that might draw attention.

Time to go, really.