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It's been this many days
Oct. 27th, 2021 08:50 amI was trying to write a post but this bus is bouncing too much.
*Scary dream
*Break from Discord server
*Poetry
*Scary dream
*Break from Discord server
*Poetry
Oct. 27th, 2021
I think some my new sheets have arrived at my mailbox. The flannel, I hope; yesterday I was thinking about how nice a cozy, freshly laundered bed is, and that it's getting cold enough to sleep under my comforter.
I had a scary ridiculous dream, though. A huge wave, wiggling up the sky, and then crashing, hard, over me. Symbolism much? When the wave crashed, it made a car engine catch fire. The place was "Pike Place Market" but it was actually the same feel as that other dream a while back with the long shoreline of cliffs, also a place of towering waves.And we were all trying to escape down a steep hill, winding tunnel afterward.
I'm being a bad kid because I'm alone in the office at the mo'.
My niece has been feeding the Stellar's jays, which let to the thought, "Quoth the blue jay, 'Peanuts! More!'."
I'm taking a break from the PB Discord I've been haunting for like three years. There was another incident and I feel like I need a sign, X days since last work site injury. But this time, I just... I've been trying. And I'm not seen, another person's pissy behavior got them sympathy, and that biased reaction just did me in. You just want someone to say, "I get you," y'know? I don't salt, I don't fight with people, I leave (without comment) conversations that are taking a direction not for me, I organized a community activity that made use of the server prompts -- but I still feel like no one wants me there. Maybe that's all in my head but it doesn't make sense to keep hanging out in a metaphorical construction zone if the high viz vest isn't enough.
So, I deleted the app. I miss the habit of checking in over breakfast. Gonna have to find something else. But, something less emotionally stupid to do.
I had a scary ridiculous dream, though. A huge wave, wiggling up the sky, and then crashing, hard, over me. Symbolism much? When the wave crashed, it made a car engine catch fire. The place was "Pike Place Market" but it was actually the same feel as that other dream a while back with the long shoreline of cliffs, also a place of towering waves.And we were all trying to escape down a steep hill, winding tunnel afterward.
I'm being a bad kid because I'm alone in the office at the mo'.
My niece has been feeding the Stellar's jays, which let to the thought, "Quoth the blue jay, 'Peanuts! More!'."
I'm taking a break from the PB Discord I've been haunting for like three years. There was another incident and I feel like I need a sign, X days since last work site injury. But this time, I just... I've been trying. And I'm not seen, another person's pissy behavior got them sympathy, and that biased reaction just did me in. You just want someone to say, "I get you," y'know? I don't salt, I don't fight with people, I leave (without comment) conversations that are taking a direction not for me, I organized a community activity that made use of the server prompts -- but I still feel like no one wants me there. Maybe that's all in my head but it doesn't make sense to keep hanging out in a metaphorical construction zone if the high viz vest isn't enough.
So, I deleted the app. I miss the habit of checking in over breakfast. Gonna have to find something else. But, something less emotionally stupid to do.